I have been reading Paul Tripp's book called--What Did You Expect??Redeeming the Realities of Marriage.
In this book he gives a definition of what he feels cruciform love is: "Love is willing self-sacrifice for the good of another that does not require reciprocation or that the person being loved is deserving."
I like this definition and it is good to think on. He says we get our" best definition of love from the cross of the Lord Jesus Christ. Christ's sacrifice of love is the ultimate definition of what love is and what love does. In this passage John is calling us to cruciform love, that is love that shapes itself to the cross of the Lord Jesus Christ (cruci = 'cross' and form = "in the shape of' ). "
He was applying some of I John 4. I felt this was good to think about and reflect on.
I think I will link this to Barbara's http://barbarah.wordpress.com/ The week in words